"The Dandy Bitch"
unapologetically opinionated editorial page:
(Editors note: Frank Orrall does not accept responsibility for anything the Dandy
Bitch Says. All the views below are the sole responsibility of the Dandy Bitch, and may or may not reflect the views of Mr.
Orrall - However, Frank can in no way be held responsible for this content...
He is however, responsible for
the Dandy Bitch's bar tab - which is considerable).
Topic # 1: "Finding
your true self, and living and breathing it every day"
I sometimes feel like this world is so complex
and dense that I have a hard time keeping my finger on the pulse of the things that really matter to me. So I Went out and
bought an old rotary dial phone... & that helped, a bit.
But I still have to stop and ask myself "who am I really before all the screaming noise of
advertising and pop culture?".
I think that everything you do is a reflection of who you are. And we need to live
with a child's wonder and joyful abandon - even as adults - maybe even especially as adults so we set a good example.
It's late at night and I'm slightly drunk - which means this will be a bit ramble-y and opinionated - but honest.
talking to the Men here - but you women might take something away from this too...)
1 - Dress only in the clothes that express who you really are: wear
them every day if you have to.
I like the old European men who wear their work clothes and apron for work and the same
damn suit day in and day out, and patch the elbows when they wear out, for "dress clothes".
Peasant wear beats the crap outta Abercrombie and fitch (with a spatula).
Never just throw some shit on 'cause it is comfortable'
- it just doesn't suit you. It "clothes" you - but it doesn't suit you.
Never, ever, wear corporate
advertising clothes (like a Nike t-shirt) - that's for sports people to please their sponsors & for kids who don't
know any better.
If your lover
or mother gave you a coat that you don't really like, but "it's keeps you warm"... drop it right the hell
off at salvation army, & instead take that blanket you bought in Tijuana that you LOVE and wear it instead - "good,
the bad and the ugly" style.
If you always liked pirates, and secretly envisioned a dream of wishing to have lived a sailor's life, then bring
some of that flair to your clothes ( I mention this as an example because I have this obsession: for instance.... I only wear
sailor pants... ever. Period. In fact, my friends have strict orders to shoot me if they ever see me in a pair of jeans) (not
that jeans are bad - only that they just are NOT me - and frankly they look silly on me - and nobody cuts them right for me
and my wide hips - except the guys who cut sailor work jeans (the wide flairs even out the hips) - but I am biased here and
I accept that.
I think this world just tells us what to wear - and the people who sell us clothes don't honestly care how we
look in them - they only care that we buy them, and frankly we men have settled for shit for clothes.... I mean go look
at any store that sells suits and you will see row after row of the same cut idea: the only variance will be: the number of
buttons ( 1, 2 or 3 - but I dare you to find a 4 button coat - I've tried) and the other variance will be 'what shade of grey or black or brown?' - and not even GOOD rich brown - I'd kill for a rich
brown suit - but bland brown... just kill ME now; get it over with ). (O.K. that's dramatic, but the Dandy is a
A man's dress selection is, apparently; a bland ass suit, or jeans and a logo'd t-shirt and sneakers. ACK!
have it a lot better - way more selection, (and there-fore I believe a woman in a suit / skirt with sneakers & white socks
deserves NOT to be forgiven).
HERE IS THE RUB: - on the whole - people dress worse now than ever
An old Portuguese fisher man in the 20's / 30's & 40's looked 127 times better than any
guy in a sports t-shirt, sneakers and jeans.
I know I sound like a fashion bitch - but believe me I am not - I just
hate to see people settle for the norm when the norm sucks.
Hemingway always looked good. And his writing reflected that. (note: that's kind of a 'bitch'
seriously... you decide....
What it really comes down to is 'dress up' for the pure joy of it - (life is too short)....
and I don't mean "fancy" 'cause faux fancy is worse. Just dress in a way that reflects
you as you truly are - what you truly believe in. (i.e. your inner Dandy, or 'Dandess')... And wear
that shit to the bank, & to the grocery store, & the department of motor vehicles and to sound check and the stage
- it's all the same.
(I have to say it bothers me when I see
a band show up for sound check in shorts,flip flops and t-shirt, only to put on "stage clothes" for show-time...
it's like they are just getting 'into character' for the show! Bull shit. Your 'stage
clothes' should be 'your clothes'. Period. You should wake up in your 'stage' clothes.
Wrinkled "hot" is better than Frumpled "not". (What a bitch).
O.K. - to go even farther: If you look at the Japanese, Native
Americans, or the Gypsies, or the Hawaiians of olde - NOW THAT IS SOME SOULFUL CLOTHING.
I propose we dress up in the phantasm
of our imaginary self - BECAUSE that is more REAL than the 'dress down' uniform of conformity of social mores.
(what all this means):
Become your eccentric self - (the whole world will love you for it, and will breathe a sigh of relief) because
by doing so, you will set them free to do the same for themselves.
(end of 'Bitch Broadcast'.... for now... I need a drink)